Dear AunT,

Q: How do you help your partner cope with disappointments?

Signed: C.A. ~ Partner4Life

A: Depending on the severity of the disappointment, there are a few ways that you can help your partner cope. Unless you are a professional, licensed therapist or counselor, do not try to diagnose your partner. This action will shut your partner down and they will not trust you. You are partners because of the trust. During this time, he/she really just need you to listen, hold, hug, or just be there, so do not play doctor. If it becomes too much for both you and for them to handle, seek professional counseling/therapy. It is perfectly ok to allow others to intervene.

Here are a few ways to help your partner:

1. Listen. Don’t try to give interventions, advice, comparisons, etc…just listen.
2. Hug. Sometimes a hug will do it.
3. Offer your partner a bath (yes, men as well can take baths!). Sometimes just sitting in the water can relax the nerves and tension so that release can take place. You can also add Epson salt or bath cocktails such as bubbles.
4. Change the mood. Make the environment stress free by turning on soothing music, lighting candles, utilizing a vapor with oils such as eucalyptus or peppermint.
5. Offer personal space. Your shoulder/lap/body can be soothing for your partner to cuddle, hold and even cry on.
6. Most importantly, say a prayer and words of affirmations. Let your partner know that everything will be alright. :)

Until next time, I’ll chat with you later!

Love ya,
AunT
Trinette Collier Green is a Certified Relationship Stylist
Submit your questions to simplycindyblog@gmail.com